Wednesday, December 30, 2009

12/30: The Gap Widens

You know those bike races you see on tv once or twice a year, during the Summer Olympics or when you happen to flip to that one outdoor channel during the Tour de France? There's always that one guy, every race, who says 'screw it' and surges way ahead of the pack. The distance between he and the peloton keeps growing wider, and the announcers treat him with a sort of amusement; they know he's going to tire out, get caught by the energized mass late in the race, and fall out of contention. Once in a while, though, that lone wolf makes the gap a little too wide, and things start getting dicey. When the peloton reacts, there's a bit of panic, because the unthinkable might happen- it might be too late. The crazy bastard might actually have created enough space, he might actually win!

So it is with Tom Fisch, our current leader. His PPR is abysmal, the lowest in the pool at 270. All indications are that the pack should catch him, that he's running on pure fumes, that he's in the midst of a fool's mission bound to end in disaster. But he keeps pedaling! Last night's Wisconsin-29 pick puts him 50 points ahead of the nearest competitor, and he's close to making this whole PPR thing obsolete.

But the peloton is coming, sure enough, which brings us to our first feature.

The Fan Favorite

Today, it's Jeff Hawkins by himself. He notched another modest win last night with Wisconsin-9, and is now alone in fifth place, just outside the money. His PPR is a remarkable 401, a good 130 ahead of the leader. America sees the spirit of the underdog in Jeff, and their hopes and dreams are rising with his climb up the leaderboard. Personally, I see him more like his namesake, the Hawk. He's circling high above, letting the life source drain from those below, and soon he'll swoop. If he scores a big win tonight with Arizona-23, the feeding frenzy will begin.

The Day's Biggest Winner

HELTER SKELTER! You didn't think she was done, did you? Content to vanish from the scene, like smoke after a magician's trick? She is the magician! And while you were staring at the smoke, she pulled a rabbit out of the hat! P-Curry is back, with a bold tails-never-fails Wisconsin-31 pick.

The Day's Biggest Loser

The lovely Emily Radford has been dying to get a mention on this blog, and now she has it for all the wrong reasons: Miami-29. Her strategy was to look at the quarterback from each team and pick a winner based on which was the cutest. This is a true fact. Unfortunately for her, this is UW QB Scott Tolzien:

There's an old proverb about books and covers, Emily. Shame on you.

The Showdown: Helter Skelter vs. Mr. By-The-Numbers

Your math can't protect you now, Dave Ryder! Sister chaos rules all about; Patricia's UW pick puts her ahead 97-86, while Dave is left shouting curse words at his calculator.

The Schneid Watch

The cheese stands alone: Charles Rosen, at 3-9, has planted his flag on the Schneid's highest mountain, daring any and all to match his utter incompetence.

The Over .500 Club

The club grew considerably more selective yesterday. Tom Fisch, Brendan Mooney, and Billy M. are the grand masters at 8-4, while Dan Mooney, Spike Friedman, Joey Keppel, and Noah Davis have access to the VIP lounge at 7-5.

The Battle of the Brothers

The Fisches retake the lead! It's a seesaw battle the likes of which we've never seen!!!!!

Fisch Brothers, Tom and Joe: 2 entries, 308 points, average: 154
Mooney Brothers, Dan and Brendan: 2 entries, 280 points, average: 140
Ryan Brothers, Steve and Dan: 2 entries, 217 points, average: 108.5
Thomason Brothers, Nick and Eric: 2 entries, 179 points, average: 89
Brothers Forsythe, Jeremy and ??: 1 entry, 78 points, average: 78

Young vs. Old

A new development: Spike Friedman, not Jake Berkowitz, is the youngest entry at 24 years of age. The impostor has been cast from the throne, and this is not the best news for Tom Cowell. Spike is in 4th place with 154 points, with his fast cars and his loud music and his fancy shoes, while the wily veteran plays possum in second-to-last with 42 points, telling stories about how things used to be cheaper when he was a kid and waiting to spring his trap.

The Relative Game

Rankings, 12/30: 1,8,15,16,17,18,19,22,30,31.
Strength of the gene pool: Below Average.

Two games tonight as the pace of the pool really picks up: Bowling Green-Idaho (this is the sound of me snoring) and Arizona-Nebraska. I won't copy and paste my whole write-ups, since it just adds insult to injury, but for what it's worth I like Bowling Green and Arizona. Standings below, have a nice day.

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